uH`m hoLdin baC aLL maH` tEars For yuuE ]] * --

2004-11-24T23:40:00.000-08:00

darn it..hate it..feellin damn bad man..not sure why ah..haiSss..long tym no blog..ytd mah` sista got her results..was expectin better results frm her actualli bud nvm..at least she tried her best unlike me..delibrately wantd to fail..bud got reason wad..i didn wanne be one of those gals..those in expres..i used to be one of em..haiyo..forget it larr..its nv gonna be repeated again niwae..even if it can i wouldn wanne be wif em..never ever again..bud sumtyms got miss em too..dono y..tink mah` mind was playin tricks wen uh` mis em` uh` guess..

[ meLvin ]
haiss..wher do uh` start uh` dono..uh` guess i was wrong to ask u to go bax to cloude..i didn expected this to happen..realli wor..she told me she lurved you..she told me she wanted you..but her decision made me wonder whether d words she said were real..i dono..okaes..now straight to da point okaes..giv up on me..uh` dn wanne cheat ur feelings or hurt u..uh` oni wan u to be happi..as my brother..uh` dn wanne lose such a great korr lyk u wor..u dote on me lorr..if lose u who dote on me??..haiss..realli sry leis..haiss..melvin if u eva read this PLEASE DON AVOID ME AFTER READIN THIS SHIT OKAES!!!!!..uh` wan u to treat me lyk how u use to..lyk a sista..not more ten tat..uh`m sure tat ther are other betta gals ten me out ther..uhm jus not da one for yeu to luv...korr..sorry..
[ fangxfang ]

[ kris ]
hahas..koRrr..thnx for tellin me it myte not be too late..uh` realli hope its not..uh` realli hope it hasnt ended yet..u rox to da core can..hahas..luv yeu man`as a bro okaes..hahas..uh` tink u shud not gib up too okaes..tat relationship myte not last..and who noes she stil luvs yeu`..hahas..okaes..sry la..i alwaes jump to conclusion..tats me wad..u said uh`m naive..not oni u..others too..hahas..uh` guess i m..am i?..*uh`m wonderin*..hahas..muaCCks for yeu`..
[ fangxfang ]

woah..ok..erm..currently happy this daes..oh yea..uh` wanne be les..ALL GUYS ARE DA SAME..bud it don seem to work sia..haiyo..so luan..hahas..haiss..sumtyms jus wish tat uh` can fst forward tym to see wei zhong..miss him man..oh oh..aiya..bud uh` dn lyk him larr..oni miss da tyms we tok on da phone sayin toOpid stuffs to li siao each other..miss those daes..he realli cheered me up aft mah` brk up wif `ivan lorr..hahas..hes funny lorr..cant wait to see him..then can tok cock..talk alot of nonsense one we both..hahas..wei zhong..faster cum bax..loLs..lookin forward to see u..i kelian ur gal ah..confirm at hum depressed de..confirm wanne see this full of nonsense bf of hers..loLs..jokin oni wor..dn kill me wen u kum bax okaes..hahas..okaes..uh` have nth much to sae lerr..very happy..dono why..loLs..okaes..dats it..muaCcks everybody..luRrbe u ALL..loLs..[ mind me uh`m gettin abit high..loLs.. ]

2004-11-22T20:37:00.000-08:00

haiSs..think no matter wad i do i cant change it..can i?..tats da fact tat u`re neve gonna accept me bax as a fren can you??..haiss..i dono wad te` do..to give up or not..haiss..

2004-11-19T20:57:00.000-08:00

wtf lorr..i wake up my eyes damn swollen wor..all bkus of tat toOpid bitch at hum..wonder y she livin wid me..wad i do to u??..i onli wan ask them wheres my wallet wad..i neve even ask u leis..i ask meimei grandma they all leis..did i ever utter one fuckin word out of my mouth to u??..i neve!!..cb bitch..wad u wan frm me?..u sae i was rude..wtf?!..i didn even tok to u wor..now my eye got slight internal bleed now u happi abt it??..IM SURE U ARE!!..orbi ah..jerlize..thanx soo much for slappin her face..she realli deserves it..i don care who the fuck she is to me..jie..actualli u shud have hit her harder..make her eyes swell more then mine..i hate her damn lots wor..ask joan ah..she was ther..i di nth to her..i oni shoutin for my wallet..ten she extra ask y y y..y ur lan ah!!..u not happi wid me go court settle ah..aehs bitch..i think u shud sae thnx to tanti..for teaching me violence is not a wae to solve things..luckily i didn hit u bax..and SHE WAS THE ONE THAT STOPPED ME FRM MAKING AS POLICE REPORT ok..if it wasnt for her i think u`d be in lock up now..i hate u..mummy n u da same..daddy even worse..all of u except da` ones dat took care of me are just worthless bitches okaes..u`re even worse then a dog..i hate u soo much..get out of my life..cus YOU ALL ARE MAKIN T MISERABLE for me..u got that..wah..aehs bitch..if u hit me one more tym ah..i confirm wil go kitchen take knife kill u..don think i don dare okaes..jus make me..try me..test tat fuckin patience i have for you..cb bitch..GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!!..hate u..u think da jie er jie meimei lyk u isit??..pls la..WE WANT U TO GET OUT OF OUR HOUSE!!..once you`re out the family wud ve peace..u think we donon u bad mouth tanti??..pls larrs..we noe okaes..onli da` jie don wanne make things worse..actualli jerlieze i regret speakin up for her..y am i so soft hearted..arrgh..toOpid..idiot bitch!!!..get out lars..

2004-11-19T05:24:00.000-08:00

wat the fuck man..haiss..how i wished i lead a normal life again..how i wished i was that juainna who took everythng for granted..tat juainna tat was happy go lucky..tat juainna w/o troubles..tt juainna tat he luved..i wonder wad e fuck happen to me..wad the fuck im doin letting off all my long term frens go givin them toopid reasons..bud y cant u guys understnd the state im in..im bad!!..arent u afraid id influence u to b lyk me?..if ure not well i m!!..i dont get u all..why cant u jus stae awae frm this bitch till im safe??..im trapped in a room wher oni bad ppl exist..cant u see that im tryin hard to be myslf so tat i cud save u all frm bein lyk me?..cant u??..i don understnd u..neither can i understand myself..haiss..im sorry..

[ its fer` u cindy ]
i noe letting u go ish not de choice..i don wan to bud i have to..arent u afraid tt u`ll be lyk me??..haiss..i dono..haiss..i miss u..
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

[ its fer` u dwitx ]
u wrote this...
hey ju..i'm sorry i havent really been there for you.all those times i longed for you to come back.. all those times i glanced at your seat and wishedyou were there.. all those times i prayed and somehow trusted thatyou'd return fine..all those times i was waiting for you to come back..all those times they kept dissing you and i tooknone of that, telling myself you arent like that.. all those times i thought you'd be okay..i didnt know you were troubled. and i'm sorry i didnt.that time you asked me if i tried finding out..and i didnt. you stumped me. i'm sorry that ireally didnt. but it's not because i dont care. iguess i trusted too well.. believed too much.somehow i had the feeling you were gonna be okay..and i'm sorry my thoughts turned out wrong. when you came back that day.. i was psyched.. i was bloody hell glad.. but i didnt know you werent.. and it just stumped me.. it left me dumbfounded to actually see you like that. and after that we arent that close..but.. i never changed my mind..i didnt think that they were right when theydissed you..i didnt think that you wouldnt be okay..i didnt think that tell myself i was wrong inthinking you arent what they said.. it's just that..you never came to me.. you never came back.. i was waiting. and i might as well add that i still am. i was really glad to see you and joan.. even though i seemed more to be surprised than happy. but i just wanna wish you all the best.. i found your blog. after so long checking your oldblog and receiving no signs of any updates. so.. yea.. now i know what's going on..and i'm sorry it took long. -love, dwitx.

its alryte..i don mind..u tried to show me u cared..bud i cuden feel it..i guess..its rather u didn knew me at all..i noe im not tat gaL tat used to sit beside u n talk soo much..haiss..bud im tryin hard..tel u..i cried wen readin this..so touched..haiss..
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

now..im gonna wait awhile till i can drink..i don care wad happens to me next..i don care im id be dead drunk..i jus wan time off after soo many things tt happen ytd..i got hit by my so called mum till my eyes swollen..i wonder..why must u do this to me?..wad did i do??..i didn do anth to u..y mus u hit me til so bad??..am i tat bad to u?..am i a jinx to u??..if i am y wud u wan to be my mummy??..why??..i hate u..for e rest of my life id be doin this job and that is to hate u..

[ its fer` u ivan ]
haiss..can u come bac??..will u??..if u will wen??.. can u help me amend my life??..u`re d one i look up to most even though u .......... me..i need u to help me..can u make me forget u??..wil u?..haiss..i noe writtin this here wont help..bud wat ken i do?..i noe this wud mean nth to u..i noe..bud i jus wan u bac..i don noe y??...somebody..get me off this mess..im in such a great mess..haiss..bud no matter wad id stil be ther for u if u need me..haiss..i miss ur voice..i miss ur touch..i miss talkin to u..i miss ur hug..i miss ur kiss..i miss ur care n cincern..i miss u..damn lots..haiss*tears*..
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

2004-11-17T03:42:00.000-08:00

[ its fer` u cindy ]
cindy..im not doin it on purpose..i didn mean to brk ur heart..not onli ur hearts brkin my dear gaL..mine too..its brkin hard..u myte nt knoe y?..ryte..gal..ITS FOR YOUR OWN GOOD!!!..don tel me tt im ur onli fren in this world??..am i?..no..im not..u have others who care for you even more..wad do i have?..i`ve got nothing..i onli take those stuffs to make me not sad smoke scold scold scold ppl wen they in da wrong..i onli take things as it is..i neve ever thought wad wud happen in da long run..im not a good influence..ask ppl around you..they`d sae ...'ohh..juainna once was a guai gal now change lers..don go to her..she'll influence you'....im doin this for ur safety too leis..i dn wan u to end up lyk me..im sure lun` wont want u to mix wid me ryte??..lun` if u eva read tis..don deny it..u won wan me to be wid her..yeahs..you wouldnt..please..cindy..if not for me think for your own safety..think for your own life..wont u think that i`ll make u turn bad??..im bad enuff to make myslf bad..wad abt u ner..yeas..u can sae i will change..bd change for hu??..ivan??..he dooesnt lyk me nimore..and i noe nothings gonna change the fact my gal..i noe a princess needs happiness..u r havin it..you myte not knoe ur happiness..who noes id influence you till u cant even be a princess??...wad a princess realli ones is a prince who wud look after her..a prince to take care of her..a prince tat`ll luv her..you`ve got lun` to do it..cindy..id rather u treasure lun` ten treasure me..i noe wads gd for u..i was once a princess too..and ivan was d prince..i had all e happiness in da world..everyone was behind supportin me..me n my prince even tok abt our weddin dae n all those think long long stuffs..but i made a mistake..of hidin alot of stuffs awae frm him..thats my mistake..and i don wan you to make a mistake to continue on bein wid me..to slowly be bad..cindy..i love u..i really do..bud thers a limit to luvin someone..if u luv tt someone..let em go..let them be free n awae frm harm..thats wad im tryin to do..protect you..im tryin hard my gaL..i hope you can understand..*tears*..
[ its fer` u frm fang ]

[ its fer` u wei boon ]
thnx for understanding me..i guess its better if we stae as frens..i hope ur not hurt..thnx for the happi daes..bud i jus cant forget him..im sorry..its tym u find someone better then me..thnx for understandin me..*muahks*
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

2004-11-16T21:23:00.000-08:00

once lost, feelings dont come back....

[ its fer` u ivan ]
is it true?..i hope not..but im not sure abt ur feelings towards me..well..i hate this damn feeling im in..i get hurt everytym i think of da past..i wonder..have you got over everythin?..i dono..bud wad i feel lyk doin now ish cry..oh oh..i did it..now meaningless tears are rolling..haiss..why did it had to happen this wae??..a wae that both of us neve imagined..i wonder..ivan..how was ur four months w/o me?..happy i guess..are u?..happy wid wad u ve now?..do u stil think abt e moments we shared?..i dont think so..im not sure abt wad u`re feelin ryte now..bud i noe tat.i stil luv u..after all e trouble i put up for us..after all e I HATE YOUs said..after all e tyms we diao each other..after all tat i did to make u hate me more..after all i wantd to do to hate you..i just don understnd why i stil luv you..i tried hard to hate you..i tried very hard..but it doesnt seem to cross my mind that im hating you..i dont hate you..bud im hating you for the sake of hating you..im hating you for the sake of haitng myslf..i hate you for the sake of changin myself into one selfish bitach..one so called lian..i donon why..bud i really wanted to forget you..i tried so hard..bud nth seem to work..why is it so easy for u n nt me?..everytym im attahched to sumone new i can neve get use to him..i onli wanted u..am i selfish?..i dono..bud tats wat i think so..why is life suddenly so meaningless to me?..w/o i couldn carry on..i got too carried awae did i?..yesh i did..u were nice..but me ner..nopes..i was neve nice to u..u tried to make everythin right for me..i tried to show u i appreciate all that u`ve done bud i didn noe hw to..haisSs..van..if ever d dae comes when i changed..wil u come bac?..i dono..i hope so n im tryin hard to be who i used to be..please..i need a chance..*tears*
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

[ its fer` u cindy ]
cindy..my darlingx..maybe this myte be d last tym im callin u tat n referrin myself as ur 'mummy'..u myte be wonderin why..me too..bud i just couldn find tat answer to tel you..i appreciate all that u have given me..all that you`ve done for me..thnks for all the tym u made me n ivan held on in da past..seriously, letting u, my most precious lil` princess here go is as difficult as lettin ivan go..cried for nytes n had to bear the most unbearable pain inside da heart..but i noe that no matter wad i do i cant change d fact tat i have n must let u go..have you ever been in a situation wher by the best thung u had to do is the hardest u have ever done??..i have..n im in tat difficult position..i dn wan ur real mama to think tat u`re not safe out ther..i don wan ur real mama to trap u inside a cage..i noe i cant hold on to you no matter how much we want..i kno tis is nt wad u want..bud its wad i want..i don want u to get influenced by this bitch..i want to keep u awae frm harms wae..cindy..hate me..don try to hate bud jus hate..if u can do it last tym why not now?..dunt gib me d craps tat u cant walk this path alone w/o me..im sure u can..don tel me u nid me to guide u..cus u`ve got lun` to do tat duty..don gib me da craps to make my heart soft my dear..if its not for your mummy do it for me..bud no matter wad..u`ll stil be mah lil` princess n wil foreva..jus erase the memories of me frm ur heart..and erase d fact that im once youtrs..its hard for u..don`ch u think its harder for me?..cindy..no matter wad happens i`d stil luv u as my lil` princess..[ mummy luv you ] [ mummy cares for you ]*tears*..again..
[ its fer` you frm fangx ]

[ its fer` you mummy n papa ]
i guess i havent end it all have i?..mummy..u shud noe why i didn show my respects towards u on hari raya..u shud noe mummy..wad u did to us is not forgiven..it will never be..it myte be forgiven to e rest bud not me..i`d neve forgive u..mayb i will..bud it takes tym..a very long tym..mayb longer then d tym u went away..u did not want us to knoe..u think that this phrase..'..sometyms ppl keep thigs away from you is for your own good'..applies to me??...NO..it doesnt..kus it didn keep me awae frm harm..it made me hurt even more deeply..i hate you..im sorry..and papa..u think your money can buy or replace the love lost after all thee years??..NO..it cant..no matter wad d judge decides..even if i go wid u..i won lead a happy life..cus i noe u dont love me at all..im not sure..bud i knoe tat u neve did luved me..rmb wen iw as young u wanted to give me awae??...dont think tat i was young i cant rmb okaes..i hate you and nothings gonna change that fact..just give up will u??..hais..
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

[ its fer` u wen hao n christie ]
mao..thnx for al e hope u gave me..for all e tym u stopped me frm takin tat stuffs..thnx for all e guidience n care u showered me..christie..thnx for dat tym u saved me..tat nyte wid 25 rmb?..hahas..i really appreciate ur help..used to hate u cus of mao last year..bud nw i noe theres gd n bad side of everybody..thnx for treatin me lyk a sista..thnx for trustin me wid mao too..i guess u`re lucky to be in love ryte..yeas..u ar..his a great guy..he understands..he`s luvin..he`s lyk everythin wen u luv him..ueas..i noe..he`s jus great..bud ivan is more better la..hahas..yeas..bac to wher i was..jus dont let luv pass u jus lyktt ok..MUST take good care of this kor of myne..he will treat u gd..trust me..i noe him..good luck okaes..u`ve got my blessings.. =) ..
[ its fer` u frm fangx ]

[ your smile made my dae ] [ your luv made me shine ] [ your care made me safe] [ you made wads inside me ]
[ you`re my everything ] [ ivan leong ] [ i luv you ]

2004-11-16T20:42:00.000-08:00

I once loved you so much
And for so long.
Why did you leave
When I did nothing wrong?

Your smile was once the sun
On a dark, rainy day.
It would clear up the sky
And keep it from being gray.

Your eyes were once the shine
Of the world's glowing light.
Or were they the twinkling stars
That once filled the night?

Your hands once had power
To give me the softest touch.
They'd always give me a slight tingle,
Which is why I loved them so much.

Your hugs were once the medicine
That'd change a frown to cheer.
A shiver would run through my body
Every time I feel your love near.

Your kisses were once the wind,
They were fresh and breezy against my face.
They were gentle, so gentle,
It's something no one will replace.

But, now you like someone else,
And it's driving me insane.
Although it's over for us,
The love we had still remains.

And so I tell myself...
Never again will I cry.
You were once everything to me,
That I can't deny.

But I couldn't keep my promise
And broke out in tears.
The hours I've cried feel like days,
The days feel like years.

As I bury my face in the pillow,
And cry my heart out and grieve,
I've learned to never give away love
If love I don't receive...

2004-11-09T02:22:00.000-08:00

If I could take a minute
To help you understand
I am a better person
Because you are my friend.

And it really doesnt matter
If we're together or apart
For I swept you up into my hands
And placed you in my heart.

And if at any moment
You ever start to doubt
There's a special bond between us
That I can't live without.

You truly are the answers
To many of my prayers
When I told God I needed
Someone who really cares.
Someone to stand beside me
To help comfort and to cope
To remind me that there's always Some room for one to hope.

You've helped me through some things
That no one could help me through
I never knew what friendship was
Untill i first met you.

And if i had one wish it would surely be
That God would keep you in my life
Throughout all eternity.

And now I hope you realize
Just how much you mean to me
You are the definition
O what a real, true friend should be.

But sometimes
I just dont want u as my friend
Cause I noe tat i love u
And I dont wanne get hurt again.

It mae seem akward
To sae I LOVE YOU NOW
But no matter wad
I'd make a vow
That if u come bac one day
Id be happy to sae
That i once loved someone
Who cared and loved me
But from two we parted to one

I hope that maybe
You`ll give me another chance
But i noe that u`re not gonna
Be there wid me n giv me a smile anymore in my life.

("v") I LOVE YOU ("v")
[muahks][hugs]
[my][prince][and][tats][you]

2004-11-09T01:46:00.000-08:00

i tried to end the hurt i made to you . but it seems tat i dun have the power to do so . im willin to swallowed everything . juz to see you smile . juz to stop all your worries . juz to be wif you till eternity . there's fear in my heart . fear of we breaking . tried not to let moments be memories . *~cHerisH the mOments i haD wiB u~*

2004-11-08T02:38:00.000-08:00

so long never write lers..hais..so many things happen todae yeah..happy bud sad n feel guilty..me ran awae frm hum AGAIN..hais..so many haiss todae..

mummy..im sorry i made decisions w/o lettin u noe..u did it so im doin e same too..hais..i dn wanne transfer mummy..can u jus give me a chance to prove to u tat i`ll do better in my studies..i promise..i noe tat i havent been a fillial daughter to u..i neve did say sorry to you after quarreling wid u almost every single dae since de dae i moved in to live wid u..u scolded me.. "...you lived your life too long without a mother till u forget wad e real meanin of one is..."..i noe..and i admit im in d wrong..but have u eva thought abt how i felt??..i never knew wad e true meanin of a mother is..cus u were never there for me..i neve knew tt tanti wasnt my real mum till a few years bac..i sitll remember wad happen..tanti sat on e couch tellin me tat she had somethin important to sae to me..and then it went on...i cried..i wondered why didn my mum stayed wid me n took care of me lyk other mums do??..why r u different??..why did u do this to me??..nobody ever told me tat i had another elder sista..nopes..till a few months bac..why did u have to hide the truth awae frm me??..to make me feel better??..COME ON..its only makin me feel worse..n mummy..u didn do ur duty as e 2nd daughter of d family..but tanti had to do ur job..why were u soo selfish to only think about urself??..i myte be wrong in wadeva i sae..but to me..u didn do anthng to contribute to e responsibilities u had as a mother..e tittle was only given to u..but u`re not one..i don even know if u`re ready to be one nor..joanna jerlieze n juannizza hav been too kind to u..i donno y i see it this wae..but i noe tat u don deserve wad u r havin now..i hate it..to admit tat my mum wasnt there for me wen i was young..i hate it..u`re nt e onli one to blame..papa too..u guys luved each other soo much last tym..but y cant u guys ccontinue alll of it now lykhw it use to??..y must u make 4 innocent ppl suffer cause of ur both reactions??..why i jus dont understand u..i hate it to see mummy scoldin papa on e phone or e-mails..i hate it..pa..u noe tat i cant accept wad u did to us..u noe tat i ken neve forgive u..u noe tat..but y are u both STILL FIGHTING OVER MY CUSTODY??..papa..have u ever wonder hw akward i`d feel livin wid u??..u oni wan giv mummy a hard tym ryte??..why do u wan my custody wen u don luv me at all??..i hate it u noe??..i just hate it..i may b e most naive in e family..u guys noe tat i don think straight..i take things as it is n never thought abt wad is gonna happem next..y are u takin my attitude for granted??..u`re makin use of me..n i dont lyk it..if u wanted me, why not last tym??..y now??..i don wanne drag on abt this..cus i noe it will last forever for u both to answer all the unanswered q in my mind..tanti..i noe tat u`re gonna leave us for japan..u did ur duty more then enough..although im feelin down ryte sad i noe i cant be selfish lyk mummy..i must let u go n enjoy ur life ther wif ur REAL FAMILY n not us..thanks for all e guidience n love tat u showered me..i love u..grandma..me luv u too..but can u don be so irritatin sumtyms..hahas..u made me ur princess..i am n will foreva be ur little gal..i pray tat u`re safe n outta harms wae..pray tat u have a long life ahead kaes..my sistas..hey..thanks for tolerating my temper..loLs..u`re going through wad i am n for jerlieze mayb even worse..hope tat NONE of us wil go to papa..hahas..i pray..

me got to 3/7..joan 3/6..e biarch class..but nvm ah..cus we wan appeal for transfer to 3/8..don if i will quarrel wid ivan stil anot..hais

ivan..i didn noe tat u changed..to be someone more reasonable..i didn noe tat till todae..Hanis told me about u..hw muched u changed..i heard tat after we brk n b4 u n jess were together u cut ur wrist..why did u do tat??..for fun??..wad do u take us as??..a three year old??..i noe tat i`ve been makin life difficult for u..ever since tat dae..not sure wen..i hated u..yeaps i really did..not animore cus i heard tat u change to be a more good boy..hahas..more reasonable..not sure abt wad made u change..but im glad u did..i sorry IF i was de one tat hai u kena beaten up in Lot1..im not sure whether if i made e thing started..im not sure who beat u up..but if i was my fault im sorry..im not jus sayin it for the sake of showin all of em tat im an angel..i really mean it..honestly..i called alot of ppl to ban u from alot of places..i did..but i told em to sua lers..i fell damn bad for doin wad i did to u..i alwaes said tat u gave me miserable life..but i didn thought abt e miserable life i gave u..hais..i oni think abt myself..i dono y..mayb cus u .... me..tat`s y..hais..sometyms wen i sit down n think abt e past, i cry..i dono whether i gt over u not..but im tryin hard..really hard..tat tym u smsed me in da nyte..asked me whether i neede a hug..i wonder if u realli mean it or not..my feelings saes tat u`re jus playin ard..i dono..mayb im manglin u..tats wad u hate abt me..i noe..wad e fuck is wrong wif me??..hais..i really changed..to someone i dono noe..someone tat nobody noes..hais..

mao kor..u have doted alot on me..had high hopes for me..but i made u disappointed..i changed n u tried to change me but failed..i dono wad to do tomyself..yeahs..i realise tat i changed..bud..i can assure u tat next year im gonna try hard n do better..this i promise u..hais..

[a note for everyone]
sorry if i have ever hurt u in anyway..im sorry..im tryin hard to be hu i used to be..gimme` tym..hais..*tears rollin down my face*

("v") [L][u][r][v][E] ("v")

2004-10-15T22:09:00.000-07:00

when uh` saw ye`..
uh` was afraid to talk to ye`..
when uh` talked to ye`..
uh` was afriad to hold ye`..
when uh` hold ye`..
uh` was afraid to lurve ye`..
now tt uh` lurved ye`..
uh`m afraid te luz ye`..
yesterdae ish history..
tommorrow ish a mystery..
todays a gift..
thats why its called present..
sometimes lurve hurts..
if it doesnt hurt it is not called lurve..
hold on to da person ye` lurve..
before they slip away..
if not u ken never get them back..
uh` regretted..
not holdin on te ye`..
and now tt ye`r gone..
uh`m wishin tt ye`ll get near..
hais...

sumtyMx

2004-09-10T01:43:00.000-07:00

+ sometimes +

+ uh've got nothin to do +

+ uh' jux lay around +

+ tinkin of ye' +
+ mah' thoughts of us +
+ uh' cant deny +
+ uh' wish uh' cud turn bax +
+ da' handx of tym +
+ but uh' gotta noe tt life +
+ is not oways wat it seems to be +
+ cux no words can describe +

+ wat ye' mean te' me +

da' raiN

2004-09-10T01:30:00.000-07:00

[[when uh' luk into ur eyes]]
[[uh' ken see d lurve restrained]]
[[darlin wen uh' hold ye']]
[[don'ch u noe uh' feel da same]]
[[nothin lasts foreva]]
[[and uh' noe ur luv has changed]]
[[its hard to hold da' candle]]
[[when uh'm alone unda da' rain]]
[[if ye' take da' tym]]
[[pls lay on da' line]]
[[where uh' ken rest mah' head]]
[[knowin tt ye'r mine]]
[[so if ye wanne lurve me]]
[[pls don'ch restrain]]
[[cux some others are out ter]]
[[unda tix cold rain]]
[[ye' noe uh' don'ch tok to kip an open heart]]
[[cux sum ppl r out ter te' harm]]
[[but if ye' ken heal mah' broken heart]]
[[wouldn tym b out te' charm??..]]
[[when ye' feel silence]]
[[and shadows still remain]]
[[uh' noe ye' cant luv me]]
[[wen ther's oni me te' blame]]
[[nvm da' darkness uh'm in]]
[[cux ye' have found ye'r way]]
[[nw uh noe nth last foreva]]
[[not even tis damn cold rain]]

uh' doNt waNne

2004-09-08T01:17:00.000-07:00

Sometimes...
What may be the best thing for you to
Sometimes it the hardest thing for you to do
And thats real
Cause I know that I love you
I know how I feel about you
But I also know that i don't make everything alright
And for that reason
I gotta say goodbye
Tell me have you ever been in a
Situation where the best thing you could do
Is the hardest thing you've ever did
But you try to do whats right
And I know that deep down inside
That I really wanna be there by your side
But I can't stand to see you cry
Not when its because of me
And its over, I'll never love another
I'm always thinking of you, I'm doing this because of you
Don't wanna say goodbye
I don't wanna let you see me cry
Did we have to say all those things that we said that night
Baby I didn't wanna say goodbye
So I'm just standing here wond...